Jalalip0p

You lose the one you love. There’s an emptiness inside. A void. It’s almost impossible to explain. Those who have felt it, know it. Those who haven’t, are puzzled. 

Maybe you were right. How can good come from bad? Maybe that’s why you lost your love. That’s so cruel though. So cruel.

Whenever I write these, I wonder if there’s a single person that even understands what I’m saying. There was one that could. But I lost her.

I think the most important thing is to have the discipline to do what you have to do, even if you don’t want to do it. 

Things we have to do can scare us. They’re hard. You can fail. You may not finish. But you still need to do it. 

Hear me out.

We put ourselves in dangerous situations. With people. I don’t mean vandalism. I mean like leading a girl on, and then complaining (or pretending to be bothered by it) to your other friends. Like who are you kidding? You want attention.

You’re splashing in the water. Ok, maybe not yet. But you’re running damn near close to the edge of the pool. Sure, the lifeguard’s not looking so there’s no one to blow the whistle on you, punk. 

And honestly, you don’t even want to fall in the water. You just got out. Why would you want to dive right back in? You’re not even dry from your last relationship swim yet. But you keep on running. Around and around the pool.

You run dangerously close. Every time you take a turn around the pool, your foot kinda slides on the cold white marble. Good thing you caught yourself. You don’t want to fall in, right? 

But you’re beaded with sweat all over. The water looks so cold. It would feel so good to just get back in and splash some more. 

Maybe a part of you DOES want to fall back in. Maybe you want to fall back in but make it look like it was an accident. That would be perfect wouldn’t it?

Oh, I didn’t mean to fall in, but now that I’m in, might as well splash around someone’s heart in this water. 

Go ahead. Splash.  

Try to understand what I’m saying. 

It’s almost midnight but the night is young.

We all have our own ways of dealing with stress. Fat chicks eat. Skinny chicks text. I workout.

When I don’t workout I feel so distraught uncomfortable itchy There’s really no feeling to describe it. It’s like that feeling you get on a Sunday evening. Even if all your homework’s done, you still feel like something’s missing. It makes you wanna cry. But if you cried, you’d have to explain why you’re crying. But you don’t know.

I do weird things when I don’t gym. Like today I put on shorts and then boxers over those and I had no idea what I was doing. To be honest, I think I had Deja Vu.

The point being, do what you have to to get your head straight. It’s midnight. Time to lift some iron. 

No matter how special someone seems at the time, don’t give 100% of yourself to them. Don’t make a girl feel special if you’re not serious. Keep your cool and do how you do. Because if there’s no love between y’all then all it takes is one fallout and both sides open fire.

You can always rise and decide not to destroy the other person’s reputation, and knowing you, I know you won’t. There aren’t that many good people in the world. But even bad people are good to those they like.

So maybe every single one of us is good and bad. But I don’t want to sound so negative.

I know this person.

This person is good.